As Rubina Dilaik emerged as the winner of Bigg Boss 14 on Sunday night, she was coming off a roller-coaster journey in the last four and a half months. The popular television star has had a roller coaster journey on the show. While she never managed to win the hearts of her co-contestants, her loyal audience stayed true to her. The reality show also has given Rubina and husband Abhinav Shukla a second chance to work on their marriage. The couple had announced on the show that they were facing trouble in their marriage and have also contemplated divorce. The TV actor defeated Rahul Vaidya to take home the coveted trophy.
Post her big win, Rubina, in an exclusive conversation with indianexpress.com, spoke about her Bigg Boss 14 journey, what led to her victory and Salman Khan’s harsh words for her during the Weekend Ka Vaar.
Excerpts from the conversation..
More than four months in the house, and you have this trophy in your hand. How does it feel?
It’s been a long journey of 143 days, and it was worth every effort, struggle and failure that I faced in the house.
In an initial episode, you mentioned how you wanted all the rules to be explained to you in a way one does for a four-year-old kid. When did you realise you could actually win?
Honestly, there was always a desire to win but this game is all about destiny. Hence, I left it it to destiny but continued to create my journey. I really had no clue about the game but the learning spirit has always been ingrained in me. I wanted to live with that feeling, and continue to grow. I wasn’t worried about losing or winning, I wanted to live and love my journey.
You’ve fought battles with most contestants in the house. Which one affected you on a personal note?
The one with Jasmin Bhasin and Rakhi Sawant. I have always been selective about people who enter my life. I am a person who gives every ounce to the ones I embrace. And when you do that, and your love and respect are not reciprocated, it shatters the confidence and faith in the relationship. These two people, events and incidences really hit me hard. However, I started my journey on the show with a clean slate, and I am exiting with a clean one again. Hence, I have no grudges.
You spoke about issues in your marriage on national television, and even sought help when pushed mentally. Was it difficult to open up about your vulnerability?
It was very tough because there is always a fear of rejection and being criticised and judged. The dejection part is something that always holds you back from not accepting your flaws and mistakes. The most beautiful learning in my Bigg Boss journey has been to embrace all shortcomings with grace. When you are able to do that, your weakness becomes your strength. And if you overcome this, put it out on TV and able to inspire even one life, I think it’s worth dealing with all challenges.
So what was the most challenging experience for you in the show?
There were a lot many but one in particular was the time when I could not explain my situation to my husband Abhinav Shukla. Bringing your intimate relationship into the public arena and yet not being able to express yourself freely can really suffocate you. It was very tough for me, as I wanted him to understand but could not say it in words.
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